Back And Ready...

For some, the end of vacation and the getting back to the normal "grind" is a dread.

It doesn't have to be that way!

For me. after 12 days of vacation and a holiday weekend, it feels incredibly right and refreshing to be back into my normal "grind".

This reflection makes me think about the role of vacation.

Is it the pinnacle of life?  Or is it a time of refreshing and renewal in order to be able to enter deeply and fully into a great work and living day in and day out.

I fear that for many, the subtle attitude towards vacation is the former.  They essentially live for it, and of course, in the end find themselves in a state of dread any time a vacation comes to an end.

Alternatively, when vacation is about refreshing and renewal, there is something very right and good about the end of a true vacation and the re-entry into what for many feels like the "grind".

I am thankful for key voices in my world who have modeled and talked about this later sort of perspective on vacation, and I would find great significance in being able to perpetuate this perspective to others.

Vacation...

Life is rooted in rhythms.

Successful life is about embracing those rhythms.

One of the most important rhythms is the dance between intense engagement and intense withdrawal.

For me, one of the most important elements of intense withdrawal is vacation.  It used to be that vacation was something I just looked forward to for the fun of it, but now I realize that it is absolutely essential to my ongoing well-being and value creation.

To be clear, vacation is immensely fun and unforgettable family time, but it is also about disconnecting from the normal grid of life to allow the internal systems to reboot.  And then, and only then, am I able to come back to the normal "grind" with the ability to add true value.

With every year that passes, vacation becomes a more and more calculated thing for me and my wife.  The preparations start weeks in advance and the packing days in advance, all so that when the actual event arrives we are able to truly embrace the space of withdrawal and rejuvenation.

That said, tomorrow we leave for 10 days of vacation, so I will not be writing regularly of these next 10 days. But by taking the break, I believe that I will come back with fresh and new ideas to put into writing.

Until then...cheers!

The Growth of Being the New Guy...

The older and more established we get, the more entitled we become to not have to be "the new guy".

However, this sort of aversion to being "the new guy" is paralyzing at best.

The process of periodically being "the new guy" causes the comfort zones of our being to re-fire and awaken from a slumber of not needing to think, feel, and adjust to changing stimuli.  The reality is, that although we may be established and not feel like "the new guy" there are areas of our being that need to be awakened and tapped into.

Reverting for a period to being "the new guy"...whether through beginning a new job, joining a new club, moving to a new neighborhood, working out at a new gym, or many other possible scenarios...may be uncomfortable, unknown and challenging but with the right valuation and intentionality it can be a source of great re-invigoration.

Sometimes, as a result of nothing we have done, we find ourselves being "the new guy", at other times we need to go out of the way to create situations where we are "the new guy", and regardless of how the scenario comes about it deserves to be embraced and entered into fully and well.

The Podcast Generation...

I realized this morning that I am part of what might be called The Podcast Generation...

Here's what I mean...

I was born in 1980, which means that about the time I was finishing my formal education process, podcasts were making their rise.

Now that I am midway through my 30's, I believe that continuing to embrace the intellectual and personal growth that education produces, as one moves from the ages of 25 to 35, is one of the biggest factors in separating the exceptional from the ordinary.

So as I look back on that decade long period in my life, I realize that podcasts played, and continue to play, a significant role in continued intellectual and personal growth.  And I also realize that had I been born in 1970, the opportunity would not have existed.

I would like to think that I would have found and embraced some other avenue for growth and development, but I will never truly know.

Regardless, I am thankful at this stage in my journey that I am a part of The Podcast Generation.  I have been deeply influenced by the rather out of the ordinary phenomenon that are podcasts, and I don't want to take for granted something that simply fell into my generation.

Partnership or Working on Different Parts of a Ship?

It is quite possible for two individuals to be working on two distinctly different parts of a ship and yet to require no coordination with one another...or, for that matter, to even have a knowledge of each other's presence and work.  Doing work on different parts of a ship has some value and at times is even the right approach.

But it is NOT partnership.

Partnership hinges on coordination.  A knowledge of the others presence AND a sense of how the interlocking pieces mix to create a situation where the product is greater than the sum of the parts.

True partnership (not just working on different parts of the same ship) is tough to create, but powerful when done well.

Maybe one of the greatest examples is this.

Influenced or Influencer?

Being influenced and being an influencer are not the same thing.

Yet both are important.

It is nearly impossible to be a positive influencer if one is not being influenced in deep and significant ways.  Alternatively, once an individual has been influenced deeply and significantly, there ought to be a burden to pay that gift forward in the form of influencing others.

Every individual ought to be and have both those who they are influenced by and those whom they are influencing.  It is important then to understand which role we are playing in which relationship.

The beautifully ironic thing is that when there is an understanding about who is playing what role in a relationship, there is potential for the roles to flip and the relationship to be symbiotic.

As John Maxwell put it, "Leadership is influence.  Nothing more and nothing less."

All Laws Are Not Created Equal...

Different categories of laws have underlying them different spectrums of intent.

Some laws exist simply because by the time humanity has stooped to this level, it is mandatory that law-induced punishment be the ramification.

Murder is a prime example of this sort of law.  This category seems to be fairly straight-forward.

Contrary to this first category of laws is a sort of law that aims to shape someone into acting rightly before they actually act out of line.

Prohibition would have been an example.  Trick of these sorts of laws is that rules and laws tend to have little influence on the way individuals chose to live.

There is a third category as well that we might call regulatory laws.  These are laws that put a cap on certain things.  In many ways, though, at the core these laws are intended to be pushed to their limits.  There are consequences if the line is crossed, and yet often the point is to figure out how to best toe the line.

These laws are prevalent in realms like sports and business.  Anti-trust laws would be one good example of many.

One of the important aspects with these categories of laws is to be able to decipher which is which, or which is needed in a certain sort of situation and to not be tempted to mix in ways that they don't match.

Mindfulness or Worry...

Mindfulness and Worry are two very different sides of the same line.

One side equips, the other inhibits.

One side is fact, the other is fiction.

One side is open, the other is closed.


Mindfulness catalyzes the projection of possible future situations and what the necessary responses and resources may be.

Worry is the fear of fear...an assumption of what will happen and a paralysis of how it will (or often will not) be handled.

Mindfulness is a skill to be honed.

Worry is a handicap to be corrected.


The challenge is that mindfulness and worry often live so close to one another it is difficult to decipher which is which.  The awareness of both, and their proximity to each other, is one of the initial keys to discerning one from the other.

Thank You Mothers!

Yesterday I shared with both my mother and wife that if I were to attempt to write out all of the reasons I have been and continue to be thankful for them in what they do and how they do what they do as mothers, there would not be enough words nor space to adequately communicate who they are and what they have and are doing.  And so in the end...I simply said...from the bottom of my spirit...and with everything that I am...Thank You!!

The reality is...our world simply would not and could not exist without the vital role of mothers.  Mothers are overused and undervalued.

So much of what they do is behind the scenes and long before the positive or negative results ever appear.

But the reality is...we NEED mothers!!

So...mothers everywhere...THANK YOU!!

KEEP UP THE LIFE-GIVING WORK!!

Confidence vs. Certainty...

Certainty is 2 + 2 = 4.

Confidence is the love of a mother.

Certainty can be proven by logic and proof statements.

Confidence ultimately hinges on trust and belief.

Culture would like us to think that most things are certain.

In actuality, most of the world hinges on confidence.

Certainty-based living is comfortable and confined.

Confidence-based living is complicated and robust.

The world needs confidence-based thinking and living to truly flourish.

Willingness To Pay...

Business school introduced me to the concept of Willingness To Pay.

It's a somewhat intuitive idea, and yet an incredibly important principle...

However, it's not the only "Willingness to..." that carries great weight.

The world hinges on many other "Willingnesses to"...such as...

Willingness To Love...

Willingness To Accept...

Willingness To Reject...

Willingness To Ignore...

Willingness To Listen...

Willingness To Forgive...

Willingness To Care...

Willingness To Risk...

Willingness To Wait...

Willingness To Ask...

Willingness To Commit...

Willingness To...

The list undoubtedly goes on as life goes on.

It's an intuitive idea, but a vital principle.

Law or Love...

The assumption seems to be that laws can lay the infrastructure to usher people into right behavior.

The alternative centers on deeply and holistically loving people towards a behavior that is more right.

The success of the law based approach seems questionable at best.  And even when the law based approach "appears" to be successful, it is arguable that it really is successful.

On the flip side, even when it seems questionable that the loved based approach is working, it almost always is.

Law seems efficient.

Love is effective.

The Dangers of the Phone...

Today a phone can be used for a phenomenal number of things.  A truly powerful tool.

But as is the case with everything that has power, there is also great danger associated.

What is the specific danger of a phone?

The phone conversation has the potential to allow us to dehumanize the individual on the other end of the line...to forget to be sensitive and aware of what is going on in the other individual.

The phone has the potential to turn an interaction into a transaction.

This danger is only amplified when the phone is used to transition the conversation into a texting conversation.

To be clear...talking via the phone and sending messages via text are powerful tools.  But just like a saw, a race car, and a nuclear power plant...it comes with inherent dangers that must be recognized and respected.

Inheritance...what AND how...

Inheritance is usually thought of as WHAT is left behind to be inherited.  But there's more...

Arguably, the HOW is an even more important inheritance to leave.

HOW deals with what is done with the WHAT that is left.

The inheritance of how to live well.

The inheritance of how to love well.

The inheritance of how to work well.

The inheritance of how to succeed...and fail well.

The inheritance of HOW is about legacy.  And legacy is what ultimately matters and is remembered long after someone is gone.

I care about WHAT is inherited, but I want to invest in HOW it is inherited.  How about you?